LOVE my enemies? Do I really have to do that?
Matthew 5:44-48
“You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. 44 But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! 45 In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. 46 If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. 47 If you are kind only to your friends,[t] how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. 48 But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.
John 14:34-35
So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”
I have written devotionals about love before. It's something that God puts on my heart often, and I think I know why. I don't love very many people the way Jesus loved everyone. It's something I have to work at and fortunately, the Spirit is more than willing to help me change my attitude so that I can love more deeply, more unconditionally.
Last Sunday while I was getting for church, I was listening to Dr. Charles Stanley. His messages almost always motivate me to strive for a closer walk with God. Sunday was no exception. This Sunday's message got my attention.
His lesson was on love. Not just any love, God's love - agape love.
I know most of you have heard sermons on agape love. You know it's the truest form of love. It's unconditional love with no expectations. Agape love is unselfish, understanding, forgiving and sacrificial. At least that's what Dr. Stanley said, and I agree. How do we know how to love like that, with agape love? We follow Jesus, and we make it our goal to love like Jesus loves.
What do we learn about agape love from Jesus?
1. Agape love is unselfish. Jesus put others before himself every time. Even on the cross, His concern was for His mother and His dear friend, John. But He took it one step further, His concern was for the thief who in the last hours of his life turned to Jesus. In the middle of his own unimaginable pain and anguish, Jesus cared more for others than himself. But he not only thought of the thief on the cross, His thoughts were on you and me. He died - not for his own sins but for our sins. He could have "called ten thousand angels to come and set Him free", but instead He suffered and died so that we could be saved. He showed unselfish love. What this shows me is that I may have to suffer when I love like Jesus.
2. Jesus taught me to love with understanding. He taught me to look past the outside to the heart of a person. There are times when I'm confronted with someone who is hard to love. Maybe this person is demanding of my time and attention. Maybe he/she is offensive in some way, or maybe he/she is self-centered or tries to control me. That makes it harder for me to love that person, right? But agape love requires that I look past those irritating habits and ask myself a few questions:
a. What is their background? What experiences have they had that might cause them to act this way?
b. Did someone hurt them physically, emotionally or mentally?
c. What kind of parents did they have? Were they criticized and put down, made to feel like they had no value?
d. Were they dominated and controlled all their lives? Did they feel helpless to stand up for themselves?
What do I really know about the people I find so hard to love? Would I feel differently if I looked at them through the eyes and compassion of Jesus?
http://youtu.be/P5AkNqLuVgY - Give me Your Eyes - Brandon Heath
3. Jesus showed forgiving love. How many times has He been willing to forgive my betrayals and my rebellious ways? Does He forgive but not forget? Does He constantly throw all my failures back in my face? Nope! That's the enemy, not Jesus. When Jesus loves, He forgives - my wrong doing is just like it never happened. He wipes away all my sins. All my sins! And He no longer holds them against me. If I love like Jesus, I have to not only forgive but forget.
I know what some of you are thinking. "Carol, you can't just forget when someone continually does you wrong! You can forgive but you should not forget because they'll just do it again." Right? Wrong. Jesus said forget. He removes our sins as far as East is from West. That's what I have to do if I'm going to love like Jesus.
4. I think the hardest part of agape love is that fact that it is sacrificial. Jesus laid down His own life, He forgot His own needs, He gave up everything for us.
John 15:13
There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
Is there anyone for whom you would lay down your life? I can name of few people I would gladly die for. But am I willing to give up my life as I know it for someone else? Do I love enough to lay my life aside?
I couldn't help but think of our friend Tillman. Tillman is a very active, high energy man. He's always been an athlete - never one to come home from work and sit in front of the t.v. with a beer in one hand and the remote in the other. He and his wonderful wife, Barbara, were two people who loved each other very much, and that love overflowed to those around them. They were so quick to welcome people into their home for a hot home cooked meal. But they did more than that. Their home became "home" to several young men who were training at the police academy in town. During the weeks of training, these guys had to be away from their own families, so Barbara and Tillman became their Terrell family. Everyone loved Barbara and Tillman.
But Barbara started having some symptoms, weakness, stumbling a little. It was so unlike her. She was quite an athlete herself and had always been strong and healthy. Doctors couldn't figure it out until finally, tests came back. Barbara had ALS - Lou Gehrig's Disease. If there is any disease more heartbreaking that ALS, I don't know what it is. Why Barbara? How could this happen to such a gracious, kind and generous woman? I just don't understand, but like my friend Donna says, "we don't have to understand. We just have to trust."
Tillman took care of his precious wife. People would offer to come stay with Barbara so that he could get away - take a break. But his answer was that he would take a break when Barbara was gone. Until then, he was going to take care of his wife. And he did such an awesome job. That is sacrificial love. Agape love. Tillman loved like Jesus. He laid down his own active life in order to be by Barbara's side in case she needed anything. Tillman didn't think about how much he was missing, all the things he couldn't do because he stayed home to care for Barbara. Instead, he thought about Barbara and what she needed. And had the roles been reversed, Barbara would have done the exact same thing for Tillman.
Agape love does not seek it's own.
Tillman doesn't think he did anything special. I do. I became very aware of how special it was when not too many years after Barbara passed away, Larry and I ran into another husband whose wife had just been diagnosed with a terrible brain disease. His wife was very intelligent, strong mind and body, but the disease was stealing that all away from her. She became almost child like and didn't understand how even the simplest things worked. It was extremely devastating. We sat down and had lunch with her husband and he shared how he was going to put her into a nursing home because it was just too much work for him. After all, she was not going to get better. This disease was killing her. And he said "I'm still a young man and I have my own life to think about." I tried hard not to let my mouth drop. My heart was broken for his wife, because I have no doubt she would have cared for him whatever it took, had he been the one with the brain disease. I couldn't help but think of Tillman and all the other faithful husbands and wives who have laid their own lives aside to care for their invalid spouses or maybe a child. Sacrificial love - laying down our lives for someone else - that is agape love.
But sometimes sacrificial love can mean laying down our own ideas of what our life should be. Take the husband who lives with a very ill tempered wife. She never has a kind word. She finds fault with everything he does. She belittles, criticizes, shows very little love or affection towards her husband. Agape love will move this husband to love her in spite of how he is treated. He will make a choice to love with agape love. That's what Jesus tells us to do in marriage. I know, I know. It's not fair. But it is what God says to do and even when we do not understand, His way is always perfect.
When we marry we are making a commitment to love no matter what. What happens when the life we dreamed of - perfect harmony and bliss with a spouse who caters to our every whim... turns out not to be so perfect. What happens when our spouse is selfish or rude or critical? Do we love inspite of how we're being treating? Or do we leave? Agape love never fails. Agape love does not seek its own way, and it endures through everything. Leaving a marriage because our own needs aren't being met is selfish. That's not my words - that comes from God.
1 John 4
Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.
God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.
Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other. No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.
And God has given us his Spirit as proof that we live in him and he in us. Furthermore, we have seen with our own eyes and now testify that the Father sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. All who confess that Jesus is the Son of God have God living in them, and they live in God. We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.
God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them. And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.
Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love. We love each other because he loved us first.
If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a Christian brother or sister, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see? And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their Christian brothers and sisters.
This is how God tells us to love. It's not suggestion; it's not optional. It's a command. As believers we are all called to be holy - different, set apart for the world. People will know we are Christians because of our love, so we must make love our first priority. Love covers a multitude of sins. Love is forgiving, selfless, understanding, and does not retaliate when someone does a wrong. Love is willing to lay down one's own life for others.
This is the hardest thing we are called to do but it is also the most important thing we are called to do. When asked what the greatest command was, Jesus answered:
Matthew 22:27-29
Jesus replied, “‘You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’
We can't do it under our own strength. We simply aren't good enough. But God has given us His very Spirit to live in us giving us the power and the strength to do everything God calls us to do. Not by might (or will) but by God's Spirit, we will be able to love those who are hard to love. After all, it's the lease we can do since God loved us when we were so unlovable.
1 Corinthians 13:1-8
If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing.
If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.
Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.
That, my friends, is Jesus love - agape love.
Patient and kind
not jealous or boastful
not proud or rude
doesn't demand it's own way
not irritable
keeps no record of being wronged.
never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful.
endures through EVERY circumstance.
Do you love with agape love? We have to make a commitment to do what God tells us to do. His Spirit will provide all we need. You see, love isn't a feeling; it is an action. God commands us to love - even our enemies. He wouldn't tell us to do something without giving us the ability to do it. We'll fall. We'll get impatient or say something unkind. In a weak moment, we just remind our spouse of something he/she did in the past that hurt us. But that doesn't mean we quit trying. Love never gives up! It endures through Every circumstance.
1 Corinthians 13:8
Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever!
That's the best part. Love will go with us into Eternity. Nothing else we own or accomplish will matter, but Love will remain.
http://youtu.be/M2RqZXShfQo - The Greatest Command - Acapella FC Alumni Chorus
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