Monday, February 20, 2012

LOVE my enemies? Do I really have to do that? 

Matthew 5:44-48
“You have heard the law that says, ‘Love your neighbor’ and hate your enemy. 44 But I say, love your enemies! Pray for those who persecute you! 45 In that way, you will be acting as true children of your Father in heaven. For he gives his sunlight to both the evil and the good, and he sends rain on the just and the unjust alike. 46 If you love only those who love you, what reward is there for that? Even corrupt tax collectors do that much. 47 If you are kind only to your friends,[t] how are you different from anyone else? Even pagans do that. 48 But you are to be perfect, even as your Father in heaven is perfect.

John 14:34-35
So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. 35 Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”




I have written devotionals about love before.  It's something that God puts on my heart often, and I think I know why.  I don't love very many people the way Jesus loved everyone.  It's something I have to work at and fortunately, the Spirit is more than willing to help me change my attitude so that I can love more deeply, more unconditionally.

Last Sunday while I was getting for church, I was listening to Dr. Charles Stanley.  His messages almost  always motivate me to strive for a closer walk with God.  Sunday was no exception.  This Sunday's message got my attention.

His lesson was on love.  Not just any love, God's love - agape love. 

I know most of you have heard sermons on agape love.  You know it's the truest form of love.  It's unconditional love with no expectations.  Agape love is unselfish, understanding, forgiving and sacrificial.  At least that's what Dr. Stanley said, and I agree.   How do we know how to love like that, with agape love?  We follow Jesus, and we make it our goal to love like Jesus loves. 

What do we learn about agape love from Jesus?

1.  Agape love is unselfish.  Jesus put others before himself every time.  Even on the cross, His concern was for His mother and His dear friend, John.  But He took it one step further, His concern was for the thief who in the last hours of his life turned to Jesus.  In the middle of his own unimaginable pain and anguish, Jesus cared more for others than himself.  But he not only thought of the thief on the cross, His thoughts were on you and me.  He died - not for his own sins but for our sins.  He could have "called ten thousand angels to come and set Him free", but instead He suffered and died so that we could be saved.  He showed unselfish love.   What this shows me is that I may have to suffer when I love like Jesus.

2.  Jesus taught me to love with understanding.  He taught me to look past the outside to the heart of a person.  There are times when I'm confronted with someone who is hard to love.  Maybe this person is demanding of my time and attention.  Maybe he/she is offensive in some way, or maybe he/she is self-centered or tries to control me.  That makes it harder for me to love that person, right?  But agape love requires that I look past those irritating habits and ask myself a few questions:
     a.  What is their background? What experiences have they had that  might cause them to act this way?
     b.  Did someone hurt them physically, emotionally or mentally?
     c.  What kind of parents did they have?  Were they criticized and put down, made to feel like they had no value?
     d.  Were they dominated and controlled all their lives?  Did they feel helpless to stand up for themselves?

What do I really know about the people I find so hard to love?  Would I feel differently if I looked at them through the eyes and compassion of Jesus?

http://youtu.be/P5AkNqLuVgY  - Give me Your Eyes - Brandon Heath

3.  Jesus showed forgiving love.  How many times has He been willing to forgive my betrayals and my rebellious ways?  Does He forgive but not forget?  Does He constantly throw all my failures back in my face?  Nope!  That's the enemy, not Jesus.  When Jesus loves, He forgives - my wrong doing is just like it never happened.  He wipes away all my sins.  All my sins!  And He no longer holds them against me.  If I love like Jesus, I have to not only forgive but forget.

I know what some of you are thinking.  "Carol, you can't just forget when someone continually does you wrong!  You can forgive but you should not forget because they'll just do it again."  Right?  Wrong.  Jesus said forget.  He removes our sins as far as East is from West.  That's what I have to do if I'm going to love like Jesus.

4. I think the hardest part of agape love is that fact that it is sacrificial.  Jesus laid down His own life, He forgot His own needs, He gave up everything for us.

John 15:13
There is no greater love than to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.

Is there anyone for whom you would lay down your life?   I can name of few people I would gladly die for. But am I willing to give up my life as I know it for someone else?  Do I love enough to lay my life aside?

I couldn't help but think of our friend Tillman.  Tillman is a very active, high energy man.  He's always been an athlete - never one to come home from work and sit in front of the t.v. with a beer in one hand and the remote in the other.  He and his wonderful wife, Barbara, were two people who loved each other very much,  and that love overflowed to those around them.  They were so quick to welcome people into their home for a hot home cooked meal.  But they did more than that.   Their home became "home" to several  young men who were training at the police academy in town.  During the weeks of training, these guys had to be away from their own families, so Barbara and Tillman became their Terrell family.  Everyone loved Barbara and Tillman.

But Barbara started having some symptoms, weakness, stumbling a little. It was so unlike her.  She was quite an athlete herself and had always been strong and healthy.  Doctors couldn't figure it out until finally, tests came back.  Barbara had ALS - Lou Gehrig's Disease.   If there is any disease more heartbreaking that ALS, I don't know what it is.  Why Barbara?  How could this happen to such a gracious, kind and generous woman?  I just don't understand, but like my friend Donna says, "we don't have to understand.  We just have to trust." 

Tillman took care of his precious wife.  People would offer to come stay with Barbara so that  he could get away - take a break.  But his answer was that he would take a break when Barbara was gone.  Until then, he was going to take care of his wife.  And he did such an awesome job.  That is sacrificial love.  Agape love.  Tillman loved like Jesus.  He laid down his own active life in order to be by Barbara's side in case she needed anything.  Tillman didn't think about how much he was missing, all the things he couldn't do because he stayed home to care for Barbara. Instead, he thought about Barbara and what she needed.  And had the roles been reversed, Barbara would have done the exact same thing for Tillman.
 Agape love does not seek it's own.

Tillman doesn't think he did anything special.  I do.  I became very aware of how special it was when not too many years after Barbara passed away, Larry and I ran into another husband whose wife had just been diagnosed with a terrible brain disease.  His wife was very intelligent, strong mind and body, but the disease was stealing that all away from her.  She became almost child like and didn't understand how even the simplest things worked.  It was extremely devastating.  We sat down and had lunch with her husband and he shared how he was going to put her into a nursing home because it was just too much work for him.  After all, she was not going to get better.  This disease was killing her.  And he said "I'm still a young man and I have my own life to think about."  I tried  hard not to let my mouth drop.  My heart was broken for his wife, because I have no doubt she would have cared for him whatever it took, had he been the one with the brain disease.  I couldn't help but think of Tillman and all the other faithful husbands and wives who have laid their own lives aside to care for their invalid spouses or maybe a child.  Sacrificial love - laying down our lives for someone else - that is agape love.

But sometimes sacrificial love can mean laying down our own ideas of what our life should be.  Take the husband who lives with a very ill tempered wife.  She never has a kind word.  She finds fault with everything he does.  She belittles, criticizes, shows very little love or affection towards her husband.   Agape love will move this husband to love her in spite of how he is treated.  He will make a choice to love with agape love.  That's what Jesus tells us to do in marriage.  I know, I know.  It's not fair.  But it is what God says to do and even when we do not understand, His way is always perfect. 

When we marry we are making a commitment to love no matter what.  What happens when the life we dreamed of -  perfect harmony and bliss with a spouse who caters to our every whim... turns out not to be so perfect.  What happens when our spouse is selfish or rude or critical?  Do we love inspite of how we're being treating?  Or do we leave?  Agape love never fails.  Agape love does not seek its own way, and it endures through everything.   Leaving a marriage because our own needs aren't being met is selfish.  That's not my words - that comes from God.

1 John 4
Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.  But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.



 God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him.  This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.


Dear friends, since God loved us that much, we surely ought to love each other.  No one has ever seen God. But if we love each other, God lives in us, and his love is brought to full expression in us.


And God has given us his Spirit as proof that we live in him and he in us.  Furthermore, we have seen with our own eyes and now testify that the Father sent his Son to be the Savior of the world.  All who confess that Jesus is the Son of God have God living in them, and they live in God.  We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.

God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.  And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect. So we will not be afraid on the day of judgment, but we can face him with confidence because we live like Jesus here in this world.


Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear. If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love.  We love each other because he loved us first.

If someone says, “I love God,” but hates a Christian brother or sister, that person is a liar; for if we don’t love people we can see, how can we love God, whom we cannot see?  And he has given us this command: Those who love God must also love their Christian brothers and sisters.


This is how God tells us to love.  It's not suggestion; it's not optional.  It's a command.  As believers we are all called to be holy - different, set apart for the world.  People will know we are Christians because of our love, so we must make love our first priority.  Love covers a multitude of sins.  Love is forgiving, selfless, understanding, and does not retaliate when someone does a wrong.  Love is willing to lay down one's own life for others.

This is the hardest thing we are called to do but it is also the most important thing we are called to do.   When asked what the greatest command was, Jesus answered:

Matthew 22:27-29
Jesus replied, “‘You must love the LORD your God with all your heart, all your soul, and all your mind.’38 This is the first and greatest commandment. 39 A second is equally important: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’

We can't do it under our own strength.  We simply aren't good enough.  But God has given us His very Spirit to live in us giving us the power and the strength to do everything God calls us to do.  Not by might (or will) but by God's Spirit, we will be able to love those who are hard to love.  After all, it's the lease we can do since God loved us when we were so unlovable.


1 Corinthians 13:1-8

If I could speak all the languages of earth and of angels, but didn’t love others, I would only be a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal.
If I had the gift of prophecy, and if I understood all of God’s secret plans and possessed all knowledge, and if I had such faith that I could move mountains, but didn’t love others, I would be nothing. 

If I gave everything I have to the poor and even sacrificed my body, I could boast about it; but if I didn’t love others, I would have gained nothing.



Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.

That, my friends, is Jesus love - agape love. 
Patient and kind
not jealous or boastful
not proud or rude
doesn't demand it's own way
not irritable
keeps no record of being wronged.
never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful.
endures through EVERY circumstance.

Do you love with agape love?  We have to make a commitment to do what God tells us to do.  His Spirit will provide all we need.  You see, love isn't a feeling; it is an action.  God commands us to love - even our enemies.  He wouldn't tell us to do something without giving us the ability to do it.  We'll fall.  We'll get impatient or say something unkind.  In a weak moment, we just remind our spouse of something he/she did in the past that hurt us.  But that doesn't mean we quit trying.  Love never gives up!  It endures through Every circumstance.

1 Corinthians 13:8
Prophecy and speaking in unknown languages and special knowledge will become useless. But love will last forever!

That's the best part.  Love will go with us into Eternity.  Nothing else we own or accomplish will matter, but Love will remain.

http://youtu.be/M2RqZXShfQo - The Greatest Command - Acapella FC Alumni Chorus
God disciplines those He loves...
Sometimes God disciplines us to draw our attention to the things we need to change in our lives. He may put "briars or thornbushes in our way, to help us see our own sin.  He doesn't automatically give up on us when we sin, but instead He loves us enough to point out our sins so we will change.

Sometimes God allows struggles and suffering to make us more holy - more set apart from the world.  Nothing sets a believer apart from the world more powerfully than how he/she handles adversity - especially when the adversity seems so undeserved. 

God's Discipline is not punishment!  God's Discipline is training us to act in accordance to His rules so that we can increase in holiness and become more like Christ.  Discipline is not always easy but it's meant for good - not evil. 

In the book of Hebrews we learn that our Father disciplines us in order to make us more holy - as HE is Holy.  He wants us to be more like Jesus because He loves us.

http://youtu.be/Bo-mp_m3nj8 - Through it All - Selah


Yesterday our sermon was based on Hebrews 4.  I have read this passage many times and have used Hebrews 4:12 often.  For me, knowing that God's word is alive and powerful resonates in my heart every time I read a passage and God gives me
a clear understanding that the words are for me - that His inspired words speak to my circumstances, not just to the people who received the letter thousands of years ago.  God's word is still active, moving hearts to do His perfect will.  It is able to cut through my pretenses and excuses and lay bare my inner thoughts.  It "pricks" my heart to change those things I may be doing and failing to do, so that I can become more like the woman God created me to be.

Yesterday, our preacher, David Chisholm, reminded me that I must always look at the context of every scripture.  This verse follows the passage that speaks of the importance of obeying God if we want to enter His rest. 

Hebrews 4:9-12
9 So there is a special rest still waiting for the people of God. 10 For all who have entered into God’s rest have rested from their labors, just as God did after creating the world. 11 So let us do our best to enter that rest. But if we disobey God, as the people of Israel did, we will fall.


12 For the word of God is alive and powerful. It is sharper than the sharpest two-edged sword, cutting between soul and spirit, between joint and marrow. It exposes our innermost thoughts and desires. 13 Nothing in all creation is hidden from God. Everything is naked and exposed before his eyes, and he is the one to whom we are accountable.

No matter how good I may look on the outside, God sees my heart.  He's not fooled by my "Sunday Face".  He knows every fault, every bad attitude.  He knows what my true focus is.  God knows if my heart's desire is to honor Him and to do His will.  He knows my true intentions.

If I'm seeking truth and wanting to be more like Jesus, I still may do things I shouldn't or fail to do things I should, however, God sees my heart, and it's my heart He seeks.  I am greatly relieved when I read about great men of faith like David, Abraham, Moses, and others.  They loved the LORD and they wanted to serve Him, however, they made mistakes - sometimes really big mistakes.  But God in His grace and mercy, was forgiving because He knew that the intentions of their hearts was to live for Him.

David suggested that when we read God's word, we should read the passages as God intended.  The book of Hebrews was one letter written most likely to Jewish Christians who had fled their homes due to persecution because of their beliefs.  It was meant to be read as one letter - not a verse here and a verse there, but all together.   Some "letters" in the new testament are a little lengthy and may present more of challenge to read in one sitting, but this letter is only 13 chapters long.  I was able to read it in less time than I use to spend reading fictional books that really had no meaning in my life.  Hebrews give me such encouragement - especially in regards to suffering and the purpose God has for those times in my life when I feel He doesn't hear my cry for relief.

As I read the book of Hebrews, I came to chapter 12 and had an "aha! moment".  God's love can be found even  in the suffering.


The Epistle to the Hebrews - chapter 12



God’s Discipline Proves His Love


1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a huge crowd of witnesses to the life of faith, let us strip off every weight that slows us down, especially the sin that so easily trips us up. And let us run with endurance the race God has set before us. 2 We do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus, the champion who initiates and perfects our faith. Because of the joy awaiting Him, He endured the cross, disregarding its shame. Now He is seated in the place of honor beside God’s throne. 3 Think of all the hostility He endured from sinful people; then you won’t become weary and give up. 4 After all, you have not yet given your lives in your struggle against sin.


5 And have you forgotten the encouraging words God spoke to you as His children? He said,


“My child, don’t make light of the LORD’s discipline,


and don’t give up when He corrects you.


6 For the LORD disciplines those He loves,


and He punishes each one He accepts as his child.”


7 As you endure this divine discipline, remember that God is treating you as His own children. Who ever heard of a child who is never disciplined by its father? 8 If God doesn’t discipline you as He does all of His children, it means that you are illegitimate and are not really His children at all. 9 Since we respected our earthly fathers who disciplined us, shouldn’t we submit even more to the discipline of the Father of our spirits, and live forever?


10 For our earthly fathers disciplined us for a few years, doing the best they knew how. But God’s discipline is always good for us, so that we might share in his holiness. 11 No discipline is enjoyable while it is happening—it’s painful! But afterward there will be a peaceful harvest of right living for those who are trained in this way.


12 So take a new grip with your tired hands and strengthen your weak knees. 13 Mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who are weak and lame will not fall but become strong.


A Call to Listen to God


14 Work at living in peace with everyone, and work at living a holy life, for those who are not holy will not see the Lord. 15 Look after each other so that none of you fails to receive the grace of God. Watch out that no poisonous root of bitterness grows up to trouble you, corrupting many. 16 Make sure that no one is immoral or godless like Esau, who traded his birthright as the firstborn son for a single meal. 17 You know that afterward, when he wanted his father’s blessing, he was rejected. It was too late for repentance, even though he begged with bitter tears.


18 You have not come to a physical mountain, to a place of flaming fire, darkness, gloom, and whirlwind, as the Israelites did at Mount Sinai. 19 For they heard an awesome trumpet blast and a voice so terrible that they begged God to stop speaking. 20 They staggered back under God’s command: “If even an animal touches the mountain, it must be stoned to death.” 21 Moses himself was so frightened at the sight that he said, “I am terrified and trembling.”


22 No, you have come to Mount Zion, to the city of the living God, the heavenly Jerusalem, and to countless thousands of angels in a joyful gathering. 23 You have come to the assembly of God’s firstborn children, whose names are written in heaven. You have come to God Himself, who is the judge over all things. You have come to the spirits of the righteous ones in heaven who have now been made perfect. 24 You have come to Jesus, the one who mediates the new covenant between God and people, and to the sprinkled blood, which speaks of forgiveness instead of crying out for vengeance like the blood of Abel.

25 Be careful that you do not refuse to listen to the One who is speaking. For if the people of Israel did not escape when they refused to listen to Moses, the earthly messenger, we will certainly not escape if we reject the One who speaks to us from heaven! 26 When God spoke from Mount Sinai his voice shook the earth, but now he makes another promise: “Once again I will shake not only the earth but the heavens also.” 27 This means that all of creation will be shaken and removed, so that only unshakable things will remain.

28 Since we are receiving a Kingdom that is unshakable, let us be thankful and please God by worshiping him with holy fear and awe. 29 For our God is a devouring fire.

This portion of the letter to the Hebrews is so powerful.  It must have been a great encouragement to those who had suffered because of their faith.  The writer of Hebrews is reminding those believers to keep their eyes on their Redeemer.  Jesus was willing to suffer so much more than most of us will ever suffer, because He knew the joy that was coming.  Heaven is truly worth any pain we experience here on earth. 

After reading chapter 12, I thought about people I know and love  who are suffering great affliction and enduring great struggles. I don't think that every struggle God allows in a person's life comes from his/her own sinfulness or failures.  Sometimes, yes, the suffering God allows is to open our eyes to what we're doing wrong so that we can make changes and become more holy - more set apart from the world in our actions or thoughts.  But sometimes, the suffering HE allows is simply to draw us closer to Him, to remind us that He is the only answer, the only hope we have.  That kind of suffering can also serve to make us more holy because learn (the hard way) to keep our eyes on Jesus for strength and comfort and hope.  That kind of suffering is God's way of pulling us close to Himself. 

For the first time, I realized that my friends who are suffering so much hurt and hardship, are experiencing God's deep, deep
love for them.  He is allowing suffering so that they will cling to Him with all their might.  Our heavenly Father is reaching out in love - sometimes through the suffering HE allows - to draw us closer to Him.  As we draw near to Him through our suffering, the people around us see we are different from the world.   Trusting God when everything is going wrong sets us apart from how the world responds to suffering and struggles.  Instead of letting the suffering cause us to become bitter, or rebellious, we endure through the power of the Holy Spirit living in us.  We keep our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith.  We remember His example, and what He was willing to endure for our sakes.  He knew the joy that was "set before Him" - the joy of sitting at the right Hand of God and the joy of finishing His great work that would provide the redemption and salvation of all who would trust in Him.

I can see God's divine Hand in the hardships if I will simply trust His great love.  God loves deeper and more completely than we can could ever imagine.  His intentions are to make us holy as He is holy.  Sometimes that includes allowing us to suffer.  Any suffering our Father allows is to make us more like Jesus.  Somehow, that makes the suffering God allows precious to me.

Being involved in prayer ministry has been a blessing to me.  At times, I've questioned God, "Why?  Why do children suffer?  Why do godly people have to endure such unrelenting pain and hardship?"  But as I watch the way believers
respond to the suffering and struggles God has allowed in their lives, I know they know Him on a deeper level than I do.
They have learned to trust in Him regardless of the circumstances.  They know He will not leave them to face the trials
alone.  He is with them every single moment, lovingly guiding and encouraging, drawing them near to Him.  These dear
brothers and sisters in Christ who have leaned on God through all circumstances are different from the world -  set apart, holy like Jesus.  They trust when there doesn't seem to be reason to trust.  God is making them holy through the suffering, and although that seems so difficult to understand from an earthly viewpoint, from an Eternal perspective, nothing we endure here on earth can compare with what HE has prepared for us in Heaven. 

This is one of my favorite passages in the bible.  No matter what,  I will trust Him.  He is my strength. 
He is my Eternal Hope.  I trust His unmatchable love.   

Habakkuk 3:17-19

17 Even though the fig trees have no blossoms,

and there are no grapes on the vines;
even though the olive crop fails,
and the fields lie empty and barren;
even though the flocks die in the fields,
and the cattle barns are empty,


18 yet I will rejoice in the LORD!
I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!

19 The Sovereign LORD is my strength!
He makes me as surefooted as a deer,
able to tread upon the heights.


Holy Father, I trust You because You loved me enough to send Jesus, Your only Son, to take my place, to endure my punishment so that I can stand before You - spotless and unblemished.  Not because of anything I've done - all because
of what Jesus did on my behalf.  Thank You for Your amazing gift of love and Grace.  I want to be holy, set apart for You and for Your purpose.  I don't want to suffer or struggle, but if that's what it takes to be who You want me to be, I will trust You.
Help me to keep my eyes on Jesus, who suffered more than I'll ever suffer so that I can be with You for Eternity.  I love You, LORD, please help my life reflect that love towards everyone I meet today.  In the Precious Name of Jesus I pray. Amen.


http://youtu.be/e8HgAVenbUU - Bring the Rain - Mercy Me